A woman who decides not to tell men she's trans hits back at trolls

Transgender woman, 20, who doesn’t tell men she kisses on nights out that she’s trans insists it’s ‘none of their business’ and hits back at critics who claim it’s ‘assault’

  • A woman filmed a TikTok video saying she doesn’t tell men she’s transgender
  • Tayla Dow, reveals it’s for her safety and will tell before sexual activities ensue 
  • The social worker spent £30,000 on feminisation surgeries after coming out

A glam transgender woman has hit back at critics who say it’s ‘assault’ not to reveal she’s transgender to men hitting on her on nights out – defiantly saying ‘they don’t deserve to know’.

Tayla Dow, from Bolton, was inundated with negative comments branding her a catfish for ‘misleading’ men in clubs by not disclosing that she’s trans before allowing them to buy her drinks and kiss her.

But the 20-year-old insists that it wouldn’t be safe to tell every boozed-up bloke that approaches her on nights out that she’s trans.

Tayla said she feels that sharing a kiss ‘isn’t too far’ without disclosing her personal information.

Since coming out, she has had hormone therapy and spent £30,000 on procedures to look more feminine such as a nose job and chin augmention, but she’s not undergone full gender reassignment surgery. 

In a candid video Tayla Dow says she always tells men that she is trans before going on dates or having any sexual contact with them and feels before those stages it’s ‘none of their business’

Infuriated commenters slammed her actions as ‘deceitful’ and some even said it should be ‘illegal’ or warned that it ‘could end badly’ if someone found out afterwards

Tayla says she realised she was trans around the age of 13 and that social media gave her more insight into the trans community and ultimately helped her to understand herself. Pictured before transitioning

But many infuriated commenters slammed her actions as ‘deceitful’ and some even said it should be ‘illegal’ or warned that it ‘could end badly’ if someone found out afterwards.

In a candid video the social worker says she always tells men that she is trans before going on dates or having any sexual contact with them and feels before those stages it’s ‘none of their business’.

Tayla said: ‘I get quite a bit of male attention on nights out but I don’t go out to seek that out, I just go out to have fun.’

‘If someone approaches me in a club scenario when everyone’s drunk, and I know not all men are okay with it, I don’t feel like it’s safe for me to expose everything about my life.’

Tayla first started transitioning with hormone replacement therapy and experimenting with makeup, hair and outfits. Pictured after facial surgery

In her TikTok video, Tayla said she feels that sharing a kiss ‘isn’t too far’ without disclosing her personal information. Trans woman hits back after saying she doesn’t tell men on nights out

‘Especially to someone that I don’t even know for the sake of them buying me a drink or whatever. As long as it’s nothing sexual I feel like it’s none of their business.’

‘If someone is to kiss me then I don’t say anything unless I feel comfortable telling them. I don’t think that’s too far and I don’t see it as assault at all, people take it the wrong way.’

‘There’s men who go out to clubs and get with girls who’ve got girlfriends at home, there’s people who’ve got STDs that have sex with people after a night out and don’t tell them.’

‘Of course, if it was anything sexual or serious, like meeting up and going on a date, then I’d tell them.’

The young woman had to hit back at online trolls who accused her of ‘assault’ after she revealed that she usually doesn’t disclose that she’s trans in nightclubs in a TikTok video. Pictured recovering from a rhinoplasty

Despite not wanting to tell every man about her trans identity, Tayla if it was anything sexual or serious, like meeting up and going on a date, then I’d tell them.’

‘People should try and put themselves in my shoes and see it from my perspective but obviously if you have a prejudice against trans people then you’re never going to understand it.’

In the clip shared on Tiktok Tayla says: ‘There’s loads of people being like “you should be telling men you’re trans on a night out, they deserve to know, you’re sick, you’re vile, blah blah blah”.

‘No I’m not, they don’t deserve to know.’

Tayla says she realised she was trans around the age of 13 and that social media gave her more insight into the trans community and ultimately helped her to understand herself.

After keeping her transgender identity to herself until she left school, the teen finally came out at 16 and visited her GP who referred her to a specialist gender clinic. Pictured before transitioning

Tayla has had seven procedures to her face – a rhinoplasty, chin augmentation, forehead reconstruction, brow bone shave and lift, hairline lowering and implants under her eyes. Pictured recovering from facial feminisation

After keeping it to herself until she left school, the teen finally came out at 16 and visited her GP who referred her to a specialist gender clinic.

She then began transitioning with hormone replacement therapy and experimenting with makeup, hair and outfits.

Now a fully-fledged young woman, she often gets men approaching her on nights out trying to chat her up.

Furious online trolls have accused her of ‘assault’ for revealing that she usually doesn’t disclose that she’s trans in nightclubs, but she has hit back at these comments as ‘prejudiced’.

Tayla asks that people should try and put themselves in hershoes and see it from my perspective but notes that if they have prejudices against trans people she doen’t think they will ever undrstand

Tayla has spent a whopping £30,000 on procedures to transition into her dream feminine look, including facial feminisation surgery last year. Pictured recovering from a rhinoplasty

One commenter said: ‘It is most certainly their business, you are taking their choice away.’

Another said: ‘This should be illegal.’

Whereas others came out in support of Tayla, saying it’s no one’s business but hers before things get intimate and agreeing that she’s right to protect her own safety.

One said: ‘People acting like you should have it written on your forehead. As long as you tell them before engaging in sexual activity it’s not anyone’s business.’


The social worker says her procedures have helped her transition and gain social acceptance as a woman but admits that dating remains ‘complicated’.

Another said: ‘It’s unnecessary [because] she’ll most likely never see them again and honestly just dangerous.’

Tayla has spent a whopping £30,000 on procedures to transition into her dream feminine look, including facial feminisation surgery last year.

This involved seven procedures to her face – a rhinoplasty, chin augmentation, forehead reconstruction, brow bone shave and lift, hairline lowering and implants under her eyes.

She has also had lip and cheek filler and wears pricey £850 extensions as part of her glam look.

When it comes to dating, Tayla is very upfront about her identity and discloses that she’s trans in her tinder bio

The glamourous woman has had lip and cheek filler and wears pricey £850 extensions as part of her glam look

Posting openly on her TikTok account about her transition and the transphobic comments she receives, Tayla hopes to combat prejudiced viewpoints and abuse

The social worker says these procedures have helped her transition and gain social acceptance as a woman but admits that dating remains ‘complicated’.

She says she openly states that she’s trans in her Tinder bio so that men ‘know from the get go’ if they are pursuing her romantically.

Tayla said: ‘Obviously I’m quite lucky to have a passing privilege, meaning I pass as a woman easier I guess because I’ve had stuff done so it’s easier for people to be attracted to me.’

‘But when it comes to actual dating it becomes difficult because even if the person is okay with it, their family and friends would have to be okay with it as well and they would have to be okay with not having biological kids unless we got a surrogate.’

Commenters on Tayla’s TikTok video saw her receive an influx of hate comments claiming that hiding her identity from men who pursued her was assault

‘Some people are fine with it, some people aren’t, I guess it just depends on preference, which is fine.’

‘Sometimes it’s hard because there are people that fetishise it.’

‘It’s there in my Tinder bio for them to read so they can make their opinions and decisions based on that information.’

‘Some people match me and then unmatch me without saying anything. Some people can be a bit insensitive or some people are absolutely fine with it and just talk to me normally.’

Some other viewers of the video came to Tayla’s defence and explained that it’s often extremely unsafe for trans women to reveal their identities

Posting openly on her TikTok account about her transition and the transphobic comments she receives, Tayla hopes to combat prejudiced viewpoints and abuse.

Tayla said: ‘I feel like I’ve really come a long way especially because I’m only 20 – I’m still not exactly where I want to be but I’m a lot more comfortable and happy in myself.’

‘I think the negative comments come from a place of prejudice or people not being educated enough.’

‘They don’t understand that I’m still a woman.’

Source: Read Full Article