Learning about my girlfriend's sexual past has made me feel insecure

DEAR DEIDRE: HEARING about my new girlfriend’s past sexual exploits has made me feel unexpectedly jealous.

She has been so much more adventurous than me and I don’t feel I can compete.


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Now I worry she’ll think I am inexperienced and rubbish in bed.

I’m 38 and she’s 36. We have been talking online for several months and have been on one date.

We kissed and I was hoping we might end up in the bedroom soon, so I brought our late-night chat round to our past sexual experiences.

She confessed that she has had a lot of lovers and once, at college, even took part in a threesome.

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That is not something she is proud of and she says she has no desire to do it again.

I was glad she was honest but I was also shocked and haven’t been able to stop thinking about it since. I feel strangely sad.

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DEIDRE SAYS: Finding out about a new partner’s past lovers is not always a good idea.

Maybe you are feeling sad because you regret not experimenting more.

Or perhaps you are disappointed she has done this, even though on some level the idea excites you.

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