My son's never met his dad because he lives in Morocco

DEAR DEIDRE: MY four-year-old son has never met his dad because he lives in Morocco and we’re in the UK.

I was in a long-distance relationship with my ex for seven years, travelling out every few months to see him.

For more advice from Dear Deidre

No issue is too small, too large or too embarrassing. Read our personal replies here.

  • Dear Deidre on Mental Health
  • Dear Deidre on Identity  
  • Dear Deidre on Debt and Money 
  • Dear Deidre on Work
  • Dear Deidre on Health and Wellbeing 
  • Dear Deidre on Addiction

He is 38, I’m 36.

Because of visa restrictions, he can’t travel to the UK, so our relationship ended before our son was born.

Now that my son is old enough to understand, I’ve told him that his dad lives far away and this is why they haven’t met.

My ex contacts me once a month or so to send a voice message to our son.

We’re on amicable terms but because contact is so erratic, I can’t help but worry about the kind of relationship they can have over the phone.

Get in touch with Deidre

Every problem gets a personal reply, usually within 24 hours weekdays.

Send an email to [email protected]

You can also send a private message on the DearDeidreOfficial Facebook page.

I mention my ex to our son occasionally as I don’t want it to be a taboo subject.

Sometimes he says “I love my dad” but he sometimes intimates that he doesn’t want me mentioning his father.

DEIDRE SAYS: In general it’s best to be open and honest about what happened.

Keep talking to your son about his dad and encourage your ex to maintain regular contact with him.

Today more than ever, people can stay connected from a distance through Skype, FaceTime and Zoom, to name a few, so talk to your ex about scheduling in regular times.

You can find ongoing guidance through Family Lives (, 0808 800 2222).

NEXT IN TODAY'S DEAR DEIDRE I'm worried my agency will let me go once they know about my osteoarthritis

READ DEIDRE'S PHOTO CASEBOOK Isla is down because Ben doesn’t last in bed but neighbours are at it every night

GET IN TOUCH How the page works and how to contact us

    Source: Read Full Article